It's been a pretty nice week, but it is always nice to get to a Friday. Last night we had our meal prep group - kinda like Dream Dinners - where we make meals to freeze - it's fun - but my freezer is over full - I don't have a garage freezer, just a regular fridge out there with a regular freezer so I had also made a Costco run - note to self - DONT' go to Costco on Meal Prep Night!!! Plus Linda went to D-land and the ladies didn't know but her meals were there - so I had to shove hers into my tiny freezer too - ha ha - we'll have to rent space soon. But I'm happy because I'm all stocked up for when the In-laws arrive.... I'm not quite in the travel-mode just yet but I have a few days before I have to start packing!
I was feeling a little blue yesterday - funny how things set you off - and I'm not pms-ing or anything like that and I know it's irrational thought - but we've lived in this ward for 8 years - and before the new HFPE groups - there was a "book group" and I'm friends with all those ladies - but whenever they have a vacancy I get passed over - so I always feel slighted - it's not like I actually have time to be in a book group, but I always end up reading most of the same groups - it's funny that it bothers me so. I'm sure they have no clue that I would have really liked to have been included. One of my friends said last night she was just invited to join, she's lived here 4 years. I've always just kinda mentioned in passing like, 'oh that would be fun, I'd like to join you sometime', but not all out - 'I want to be in your group'. I don't know - I am in different groups like Bunco, but I suppose the difference is that they aren't church groups .....don't get me wrong I have lots of non-member friends that make me feel more welcome than church girls - actually aside from Linda & her friends (which sometimes I also feel like I'm crashing - because they aren't really MY friends even though I'd like them to be, in reality they are hers and I'm just the tagalong - which I love how her friends call up and want to do things) I really only have a small group of LDS friends I actually do things with- does that make sense? I'm just in a low emotional period I guess in my month - it's probably not as bad as I made it sound - as you probably have noted I don't generally bring things like this up but guess that's what's nice about the blog...ha ha because I don't have any friends in the ward that like to blog -
I have GS after school then my friend Christy and I are going to La Boheme - they opened a new big theater in the next town over - should be fun.
ill be your friend girl! but can our book group be gossip magazines!??!! im always emotional and down on myself a few days before aunt flo stops by--jon always asks..is it THAT time already!?!? im still recovering from the last "session"..nice isnt he!!??
ReplyDeleteit was fun catching up on your blog
ok i feel the same way sometimes. and i always wonder if it is just me feeling blue or if i should really be offended. and it is hard to let it slide. i have a bunko group that finally let me officially join after subbing for over 2 years. they had spots open up but wouldn't vote me in. and now that i am officially in i wonder who doesn't like me. and why. it is hard and a book club? they could make room for everyone. LDS women are alot like high school girls. competitive, cliquish and and gossipy. make me wonder why i wanna be part of the group and then i think well what is wrong with me. it is all my own weirdness most of the time. well i like you and you are my friend! and you aren't alone in wanting to be included. hope they figure it out soon and invite you to join! if not say hey i really wanna come, and squeeze it into your schedule. maybe that girl that has only been there for 4 years is really pushy. make your opinion known that you want in and then see what they do. maybe they just assume you are so popular and busy you wouldn't want to join. if you want in tell someone in no uncertain terms. what have you got to lose? i say this but i am totally a sulky boob about it. but you know tell them and see what happens it couldn't hurt.
ReplyDeleteHey you can come to my book club:)
ReplyDeleteOne of my good friends hurt my feelings the other day. I know i should get over it. But she was really a good friend.
Here is a big hug girl.
HAve a great week :)
Thanks for the kind words of encouragement. I guess I should mention that the one friend that has lived here for 4 years is one of my best friends - I'd pick her over me too :) ha ha
ReplyDeleteI'm surprised it's by invitation only. We made sure that our book group was called Book Group, not Book Club, because we didn't want to seem exclusive. Anyone can come to ours, but somehow we have a really diverse group: 85, 60, 40, 20, 34, etc. It makes discussions really interesting - my 85 year old friend just finished Twilight! It's so fun to discuss books with her.
ReplyDeleteI have kind of found that every woman in my ward feels like there is some sort of "in-group" and she's not in it! We actually had 3 families go on vacation together. They wanted us to cancel the ward party because they couldn't come as they had other plans. Interesting that they didn't think the other 197 families that I called would want to be there if they couldn't come! (They even complained to every member of the bishopric about it not being cancelled because no one would be there!)
I am feeling SO that way today! Just an emotional low (a very PMSy type feeling, but not that time of the month).Everything seems so much worse when we're emotionally drained, tired, hungry, or whatever. I feel your pain, as far as the friend thing. We've been in this ward for a year and a half and I have not connected with any women. There are women I am friendly with, exchange kids with, even go out for dinner with (in a group), but no one I'd call a true friend; someone to lean on, cry with, share joys with...anyway, I didn't mean to go on and on and on...hope you are feeling better tomorrow!
ReplyDeleteoh man.. I am sorry.. women can be so thoughtless sometimes.. if I was in a book group.. I would totally invite you! wierd that they have to have an opening! I wonder why it is so exclusive.. sorry about the downer day.. I hope those women start to be a little more sensitive to those around them.. I am do not like exclusive groups.. at all.. we have one in our ward.. a knitting group.. you have to be "invited" it is all the YW leaders who are all early 20's and about a size 2.. they "knit" every friday am, I think it is mostly eating and gossipping.. but it just bugs that people think they have to be exclusive.. I had a great friend early in my marriage who was all about inviting everyone to everything.. I have learned a lot from that example.. you can end up with some big groups.. but the more the merrier I think..
ReplyDeletewell, good luck.. I hope it changes for you.. take care
love lauralee
I totally feel that way sometimes-that I'm not included when I want to be. I still haven't figured out how to deal with it except to just not obsessively think about it. I can't believe there are only a finite number of girls allowed in a book group. If you do decide you want to be a part of one, just let me know. The one I go to includes member of P3, Dublin and San Ramon wards plus one nonmember. Anyone is always welcome and since we live close, it's one you can actually go to.
ReplyDelete